Today was the day. Noah Monster started it bright & early for me at 5:45am! Connor stumbled downstairs around 7:10am. He had this note waiting for him by his barstool on the counter.
{I did good all morning not choking up...until I read this. I just took a second and reflected on how blessed Connor is to have Matt in his life. My precious baby didn't get the life I had originally planned for him, but that's only because God has a bigger, MUCH better plan for C & I. We love our Matt.}
Before loading in the car with a baby that was due for his nap after being awake so early, I quickly snapped a few pictures of C in the front yard. I was hoping for a perfect spot. The one I will have him pose in front of each year. I was fighting all variables...fidgety baby, a child that didn't want the sun in his eyes, figuring out the settings of my new camera, and the dreaded 'fake smile.' I knew if I didn't get a few good shots in the very beginning, C's adorable smiley face was going to turn into the uncomfortable 'cheese' face.
Adorable smile success.
Mom: "Now let's take out your lunch box and get a few pictures with your backpack & lunchbox visible."
Cue to fake smile.
{After taking this picture, Connor said, "Mom, I think we need to stop taking pictures or I'm going to be late to school."}
We got to school (which is 2 minutes from our house to his classroom) and he was the first one there. He's always loved being the first one to class (in VPK). I think its like a mini competition for him. Whatever it is--I felt like the day was already a tiny success! The teacher requested I take all the supplies I bought for the class and unpackage them all before sorting them into the classroom bins.
Well, unpackaging those darn scissor packages and dry erase marker boxes are a feat with two hands, let alone one hand while holding a baby in the other. I had no choice, but to put the Monster down. It was at that moment that Noah started trying to eat whatever tiny paper specks he was finding on the floor, while I noticed my nice outfit had crusted spit up all down the front of it, all while trying to keep an eye on my Kindergartener to make sure he wasn't showing any signs of anxiety, and while trying to make it seem like I had my crap together in front of my child's new teacher. Oh, sweet Jesus!
Connor seemed like he was fine. I was now feeling uneasy because he was so fine.
I went down my final mom thoughts.
"Let me snap a few quick pictures of you and your brother."
"Now, if you need to use the bathroom, just ask your teacher to help you tuck your shirt back in if you think you need help."
I forced myself at that point to exit the classroom. Everything in me wanted to stay until the very last possible second, but I knew I needed to do it. I walked away with Noah and it felt so unnatural to leave my Connor behind. Thank goodness he was happy though.
I got the babe home and down for his overdue nap. I took advantage of the alone time to edit all photos from the morning on my computer. I couldn't help, but just stare at the clock, wondering what Connor was doing at that very moment.
As soon as Noah was up, I knew I needed to get out to help pass the time. We ventured to get some groceries. Noah made me work to keep him sitting still in the cart on the 2nd half of our shopping trip. At checkout, we got a balloon. Oh, how something so simple could overjoy such a little person.
Just as I thought things were coming together...groceries-check...happy baby-check...cute photo op-check...
I snapped this cute picture, had the car started & was ready to load the baby, when I looked up to see Noah's happy orange balloon was detached from its string and floating off into the clouds.
Why, God, why?!
Noah and I trotted quickly back into Publix to fetch another balloon before making our way home.
Fast forward to 2:30pm. We sat in the parent pickup line anxiously waiting to hear about Connor's day. The process was a mess as it was the first day of school, so we sat...and sat...and sat. I didn't get to pick up C until nearly 4:00pm! When I finally spotted him, he was wearing a paper crown he made in class, his face was all red, and he was breathing that uncontrollable breathing...the trying to stop crying heavy breathing. My heart sank. When he loaded in the car, C told me he was crying because he had been waiting and waiting and was worried I was never coming to pick him up. Oh, my sweet boy. If he only knew I'd been counting the seconds all day and got to parent pick up over a half hour early, all to just sit and wait to see him!
As we drove off, C noted, "I think I need to find a new school." My worry set in immediately. When I asked him why he thought he needed a new school, he replied, "This school doesn't talk about Jesus at all. Not once all day, Mom." My heart broke. I cried under my sunglasses. I have the sweetest little boy.
We sat down to do C's homework assignment at home (trying to keep Connor focused all while distracting a whiney, overtired baby is always an adventure). C did this all by himself (minus me putting his picture on there). I am always curious of how he defines, "his family." I let him answer it however he thought. He drew Noah (purple), himself (blue), me (pink), Matt (brown), Nana (black), and Papa (orange). Whats funny is that his answer to that question has never varied from that. I think its neat to see who he feels is family, and I adore the fact he always includes Nana & Papa.
On to day 2! It's the last day I'm allowed to walk him in to class. Day 3 I have to drop his off and let him walk to class on his own. I'm definitely not ready for that. Baby steps...
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